We spent another two hours at the doctor’s office yesterday, and our favorite Dr. M was on duty again. He’s clearly decided he wants to deliver Bean, and I’m glad about that. Once again Bean earned high marks on her tests – 8 out of 8. She’s still only measuring at the 12th percentile, but she’s gained a little bit of weight or is at least stable. Dr. M was encouraged by the biophysical profile report, and checked R’s cervix to decide whether we should plan on an induction this morning. After some finagling he finally admitted “Well, I really can’t get past the cervical opening, though you probably feel like I’m up in your tonsils about now.” We all laughed nervously, but heartily, and agreed to recheck Bean in a week. With no appreciable cervical dilation an induction would considerably increase the risk of C-section delivery, so we’ll give it another week. We go back midday on Tuesday, and if there’s the slightest hint of dilation we’ll be headed for an induction Wednesday morning, which happens to be favorite Dr. M’s on call day. I really appreciated his careful consideration of all the risks and benefits to taking action or not. He even offered to have us come in on Friday for a non-stress test if it would ease our worry over the weekend. While my inner voice said, Yes, please! My outer voice said “We don’t want any unnecessary exams.” This is me, practicing calm. Practicing rational. Practicing trust.

So we drove home and brought our hospital bags back in the house, once more. The last couple of weeks have been almost magical. It’s a special window of time between our life as a couple and our life as parents, and I’ve really enjoyed it. Despite the painful struggle through three years of trying to conceive, I’m so thankful for our many years as a duo because I think they provide a healthy foundation for our family.



3 responses to “Anticipation

  1. If it makes you feel any better, my cervix was 100% closed at 41+ weeks and I was still able to be induced and deliver vaginally. Hang in there. You guys are almost there.

    • Oh, that is really good to hear. I know an induction isn’t ideal, but our sweet girl is just too close to the border of IUGR for comfort, so the docs are not inclined to let her keep on cooking.

  2. I’ve been horrible about commenting lately, but have been thinking of you guys lots. I’m hoping you’ve had some lovely time together as a couple–and that the arrival of little Bean goes smoothly whenever it happens.

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