I’m finding it useful to write in the morning to empty the recesses of my mind of thoughts that obstruct progress toward completing the day’s tasks. This morning I cannot shake the image of New Life Baby Home, and the very real knowledge that there are children in this world, living and breathing and laughing, who need parents. And then there’s me and R, who really want to parent. Between us there’s a Red Sea of prejudice and Moses is out on another call.
I cannot believe that God prefers for children to live without dedicated parents. Without unconditional, deep and imperfect human love. And I guess it’s that belief that propels me forward, even to the brink of what could be perceived as antagonism, until I meet a wall I know I cannot climb.
I’ve read many articles in the popular press that condemn women and couples using assisted reproductive technology. Authors and commenters ask why these families don’t do the world a favor and “just adopt.” Buried in that phrase is the implication that adoption is simple. Dig one layer further and you’ll find the notion that adoption is distinct purview of infertile couples. Neither is true, and I’d like to see a more realistic public discussion of the very real impact of sexism, homophobia, and class on the various pathways to parenthood.
In the meantime, I’ll be looking for Moses.