A few weeks ago I told you about how the columnist David Brooks solicited life stories from his older readers, and one of the lessons he gleaned from their letters is that the biggest life regrets are the risks not taken. I’ve held onto this thought while we jumped through hoops over the last few weeks and as I fought back fears of relying on a total stranger for something so important to us. Today we finally met the KD, and as soon as we saw him I felt certain of our decision to let go of the socially sterile and legally simple approach to TTC in favor of an approach that feels better to us but relies heavily on the goodwill of a third party.
We met at a cafe and walked to a nearby park to talk. There were a few pregnant pauses, but for the most part, conversation flowed pretty easily and I think there was an undercurrent of warmth, humor, and relief. We were able to quickly read over the changes to our legal agreements and come to consensus on the terms. We sat in the grass and talked amidst the dogs fetching tennis balls, the pick up soccer games, the families savoring the last moments of the winter holidays. It was all a lot easier than I imagined, and I was reminded about how much context and emotion we miss when we communicate through our “smart” devices rather than just talking face to face.
All in all, we couldn’t have asked for a better man to be our donor, or a better story to tell Bean about her beginnings.